January 02, 2009

The Weather Outside is Frightful

I watched the Rose Bowl today at Rusty's, where the wings were as hot as I'd hoped but not as good as Tim Corkill (good friend and pizza wizard) claimed they would be. Our waitress thought we skipped out on our bill when we went outside for a cigarette, which Tim found extremely amusing for some reason. My other friend Alaska showed up stoned at the end of the first quarter, changing things up quite a bit. When he gets stoned he behaves the way normal people act on mushrooms, despite smoking "since 1996". He frequently non sequiters "Mike, I'm losing my shit over here" and comments on the state of the tracers he can see.

Anyway, this guy was busy talking about his balls and making random commentary on the game while I was enjoying the nachos he'd purchased. I wish I could remember what we were talking about, but basically it's all a wash and wasn't all that amusing anyway. It was a decent game for a quarter, then USC went on a 24 point run and we decided to leave by halftime. So we went to Alaska's house and smoked out, after which Alaska beat the shit out of an old mattress with his nunchucks. At some point we realized one of Alaska's trees was actually of the color-changing variety. Out in Tucson, very few plants change their color during autumn; the only real noticeable difference between the seasons out here is whether people are bitching because swamp coolers don't work or because gas furnaces don't work.

So the tree. Yeah, it had yellow leaves that were formerly green. So we all talked about the times when we were each children (living in New Jersey, South Carolina, and Alaska) and somehow the topic of tree climbing came up, which is when I climbed the tree. I did it quickly and without hurting myself in any way, and then managed to get down without making too much of a mess. Alaska then mauled his arms trying to get up the tree, we made some bear comparisons, and then both Alaska and Tim proceeded to give me stern ass-whoopings in Foosball.

"Mike, we just double-teamed you." - Alaska


The day culminated in generous amounts of Metalocalypse and guitar playing.

I wrote some things last night, as sleep was difficult to obtain:

checked into a hurricane
left the incision wide open
the decision has been vetoed
by a vegetable person
play with the health in mind
medicine man
has more tan than eyelid
and a knife in his hand
cracked tooth and Karzai
like uranium sand
or a french toast powdering
in a third world country
with limbs struck off
on the floor of the Taco Bell

The sun's coming up. I'll write more later.

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